CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

(Series -- CBS, Thur. May 8, 9 p.m.) Filmed in L.A. by Jerry Bruckheimer Television in association with CBS Prods. and Alliance Atlantis Television. Executive producers, Bruckheimer, Carol Mendelsohn, Ann Donahue, Anthony Zuiker, Naren Shankar, Jonathan Littman, William Petersen, Cynthia Chvatal, Ken Fink; director, Alec Smight.

By BRIAN LOWRY

Wow, payback really is a bitch: Living out every pencil-pusher's fantasy, Chuck Lorre -- who left "Roseanne," "Cybill" and "Grace Under Fire" after clashing with the mercurial female stars of each program -- acted out his revenge in Thursday's "Two and a Half Men"-"CSI" writing staff crossover, in which a female sitcom star (played with absolute abandon by Katey Sagal) is murdered. For those who follow Lorre's weekly vanity cards, it was another amusing demonstration of the producer's "Get mad, and then get even" philosophy, while having considerable fun with playing in the "CSI" sandbox.

Industry followers who remember such things should enjoy connecting various seemingly over-the-top flourishes within the hour to the star responsible for them in reality. In addition to abusing her writers, Sagal's character -- the namesake of the hit "Annabelle!" -- hires her driver boyfriend (Diedrich Bader) as a producer, complains when her co-stars get bigger laughs, and keeps asking various cast and crew members to feel her new fake boobs.

Of course, she quickly turns up dead, leading the CSI team's Grissom (William Petersen) and Brass (Paul Guilfoyle) on a through-the-looking-glass tour of Hollywood as they investigate the crime, where the use of a rubber chicken to commit murder is deemed a case of "fowl play." Oy.

Still, just seeing the "CSI" gang drawn into this piffle is kind of a hoot, as the off-kilter references (including the fleeting homage to "Chinatown") consistently remind us that we're not in Vegas anymore.

Lorre teamed with "Men" co-creator Lee Aronsohn on the episode (titled "Two and a Half Deaths"). Although neither series received an appreciable ratings boost from the stunt, one suspects the opportunity to break their respective molds provided both with a welcome detour -- which is worth something after you've stared seriously at chalk outlines for eight seasons.

Maybe next year the "Men" team can try their hand at a "Survivor" crossover: The writers get to take a tropical vacation somewhere exotic, for example, while producer Mark Burnett forces Charlie Sheen and Jon Cryer to eat something really disgusting and then vote one of their co-stars off the show.

Writers, Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn. Running time: 60 MIN.

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